Word of advice: If you’re an internationally famous television star, never announce on your blog the date on which you plan to record your first podcast. It’s simply too dangerous.

Because it’s still an open investigation I can’t go into details, but somebody broke into my seaside villa (somehow eluding my Anatolian Mastiffs, Peo and Latrick), and made off with the hard drive on which Joey, The Gator and I had recorded our glorious show.

There is no question that the thief had only that one piece of pillage in mind, for in order to get to my computer lab, he would have had to pass straight through the gallery and its fine collection of Nabis Movement art (heavy on Ker-Xavier Roussel and Felix Vallotton).

Whoever the thief was also dropped an upper decker in my powder room. Not cool.

And that, my friends, is why the podcast has yet to reach your thirsty ears. I promise you this unfortunate incident has only strengthened our already steely resolve and we shall record it again soon in an undisclosed, fortified location.

But the question remains: Who would have done such a thing? Could it have been Kevin Rose and Alex Albrecht, motivated by fear and ego, knowing that my podcast will surely become the fair haired child of Revision3? Or TWIT’s Steve Gibson, who I imagine, as a security expert and basis for the Danny Ocean character in the film Ocean’s 11, would know how to break into my home. David Prager has a horrendous bowel problem, which would explain the upper decker. And John C. Dvorak, of course, is always suspicious.

In the meantime, please enjoy one of my reels, especially if you are in a position to offer me work. Not that I really need any. I’ve been doing a lot of consulting work for powerful European clients.